?Â¿? DaR3 To DrEaM Â¿?Â¿

Tuesday, January 04, 2005
1/04/2005 09:22:00 AM

its the 14th day i have in Canada...i remember last year's holiday trip to here...i was like so bored...cos was with my family and another very boring family in Vancouver(another state in CAnada but its stuff its not as westernised as toronto)...its peaceful and everything...scenery is beautiful..but cannot compare with toronto as this were where i used to live at when me was young...everything abt here i remember...i feel so much better in toronto..the city part...maybe i like nature..but i dun like isolation....VAncouver is like the perfect place for honeymoon if u wanna be alone with nature and ur other half lar...but not for staying..not for me at least...

then last year...the 14th day i was already like travelling back to spore...cos i only came here for two weeks...now its six mths..hehez...not totally very long but thinking abt it..its like already 2 weeks gone...about 20 more weeks ba...things are going slow for me maybe cos i haven started sch and slacking at somewhere where i have no friends and have nothing much to do loh....i really wish i came here only after Christmas...like my mum had suggested(only after we came here..haiz)...but nayz..its over...

the answer is i'm staying on in Canada and as usual..i'll be back in the end of june...going to the private sch..no transferring(to public sch) and no retreating or turning back(going back to spore)...i'm moving on..hehez.but gd news...my bro told me i will still be able to go for music sch drum courses here..hehe...even though i already like spent 9000 dollars on private sch...but he added "but no more dvd rentals loh.."..=(...hehez...thought during weekends, i could catch up with all the shows i once missed...i'm a movie freak..just that usually very hard to pull pple to watch with me...one of my godjie used to always watch with me de...same age but different mths lar..but after she had a bf,u know...not free for me always...but still got sometimes lar..still pulled her ah beng bf and friends to come to send me off at the airport...but i guess i need to sacrifice something for something else loh...cant have everything...not filthy rich...if i was, i cant believe how spoilt i will get loh...=X

i woke up today and then MArcus and CAryn called....always talk to them on the phone in spore de...so we now scheduling times for chatting to match my sch hours...or else everything clash how?... i miss them manz...all of u actually...hehez...dunno how many times i say le..but as pple say..what can i do abt it?..nothing at all..just get done with my studies then go back le..hehez..

they bought calling cards..so far, only heard they buy...but one update,if u all really going to call..then the number is 14168800798 to dial...i repeat again...1 for country code...416 for area code....88000798 for my hp no....incoming call free 24 hour..weekday call in spore area morning..remember to think 13 hours back for the time in spore and see what time is it actually for me...mine is 13HRS Slower i say again...so u must call in my nights...or morning and afternoon i will not pick up de....the best for weekdays is at 11am or 12pm noontime....for weekends...call at night for saturdays and morning and night for sunday also can...but i doubt anyone will call lar...cos so far, very few only...mostly is i call de...poor thing hor?...hehez (ALL TIMES STATED ARE SPORE TIME...DUN ASK..)

sometimes the problem with me, is i dun take things step by step..i look too far forward..i'm already planning what to do when i get back to spore and have quite a few mths of "slacking" b4 i go NS...train bball like siao..lol...meet friends...tour spore, i miss it manz....i'm a little crazy de lar..pple like other countries so much..but i'm the type that likes advantures and holidays but at the end of the trip..i will still prefer returning to where i belong...i'm so attached to spore...i love local food in spore lar...western pple miss out on our food so much...its like they have their fast food and western food but every country has their own specialty plus western food...they have to wait until other country pple come and open restaurants here b4 they can taste the food of the world...so spore very lucky..food paradise...wide variety...

today in the morning supposedly there was going to be basketball at my bro's sch...was waiting for them to call me to go..cos they finished class only at 12pm here...but the bball timing for today was 10-12..so i already missed it...so disappointed..thought at last i can wear my bball shorts again and play again...haiz...i miss bball!

in the afternoon went square one....then wanted to do some engravement of silver...but the shops i went to, all too ex..of course lar..i went into jewellery shops....the problem is square one shopping mall is so big...u only know what shops are there at the four corners of the square loh...those are big supermarkets...not exactly supermarket...like Carrefour or Giant loh...if u get what mean...maybe i will check out the stores another day...been delaying doing such stuff for quite awhile le..but without my mum around better lar..she's getting from very naggy to worst...i know its evil, but i cant wait for her to go...i know she cares thats y she worries and stuff...but its too much care until she nags at me like a little child...."go shower"..."i said go shower..."..."u want to go anot?"...its not like i dunno personal hygiene..haiz..nvm...skip top...

tml is first day of sch..i wonder whether my maths still can make it anot...after o levels, its like i totally unstress and throw away all such algebra and stuff...i'm quite scared in fact that i cant make it...and i was like asking shuyu.."do they test u on what is a noun(action word)?..or what is an adverb(this i dunno..i know is add on to verb only..what is verb?-_-")?..." cos if they ask such questions...i know its basic knowledge of english..but its like a natural usage of english when i come to using such words....i where got think "this is a verb...so this is an adverb...can use adjective here anot?...is this present tense or is this past continuous tense?"....cos i learnt english basically in Canada...naturally just use it from the mouth...and when teacher teach such stuff..i totally just listen but switch off...one ear in one ear out...

but heng shuyu say...if u can make it in spore, no problem here lar...what my mum say quite true...pple come here from China and indonesia..thats y they want to see whether u can even use proper english...wont be hard de lar...very true...

i dunno what time i end sch tml...sometimes i even can end at 9pm...cos the classes can be like 9-12...then 5-9...its unpredictable...but they may have repetition of same classes as some combinations may not be able to suit the timings...

i heard the classes wont doze off de...i'm glad to hear that..cos in science class or chinese class in spore..i will really feel like sleeping de...that will totally take my attention off the class...which i dun like to do...i miss out on so much stuff...i'm here to do well...ppl out there, keep me in ur prayers k?..as i will also pray for spore too...;) cos i'm quite scared abt doing A levels...no mental prep...it was like o levels just ended yesterday and i just started to have fun..and now i'm going back to sch...where's the 5-7 mths i'm supposed to have b4 starting poly or jc?...hehez

if u all are thinking why i come all the way here to pay 9000 dollars so much..when i have a Canadian passport and citizenship that can get me into a public sch here...its cos my parents are worried that public sch will not be for me...cos the way they do it..i will be crashing courses...in the sense that pple finish a levels slowly in 9 mths..i finish in 7 mths including one mth of staying back in summer sch to finish..and it might not be only 7 mths if i go public sch...its also abt the environment...they say public sch de better...but nayz, to me...i think everywhere also got fights,got gangsterism and everything bad de...its just whether u know how to avoid, know how to handle and know that u are not to be influenced by them....having so many friends that are head gangsters in gangs in spore,nayz..i've seen things that are bad enough to know that "not getting into trouble is better than getting into trouble even if u can handle it"...unless u are talking abt MAFIAs...hahaz, thats a different issue..even police scared of them..see them dun dare to work le..lol...my friends in spore kind of "worship" them for how totally "strong" they r...

walked around in the bus interchange b4 the bus came for me to board at square one...then saw alot of things...pple that look like they are trying to attract attention...pple that are flirting totally with the opp sex....pple that are smoking their lives away..while pple just sitting there like gangsters in spore..finding trouble...there are always guards here in Canada...cos heard my bro say that pple here always like getting into trouble and fights do happen in public places de...its not as safe as spore...pple here can be very friendly..but those that are very wu liao and dunno what to do with their lives de hor...totally daredevils at making trouble de loh...

watched a dvd my bro borrowed yesterday called 'beyond borders"...got angelina jolie de...not meaning i like her lar...i still dun see why pple think her Fat lips are sexy...-_-"....anyways, thats besides the point..its just like its abt totally filthy rich pple having a party...a guy that does voluteer work to help those unfortunate pple in afghanistan and those places of poverty de....starvation de....he comes in, holding a boy that is totally skinny to the bones...and pleads for food and to make a scene to kind of "wake up" the rich pple that the world has unfortunate pple...but the filthy pple are so arrogant and proud...they just throw a banana on the floor then the guy is like "wow...a banana...2000(duno how many lar) calories...but more than what the boy eats in a day"...then asks the boy to act like a monkey...but instead of giving charity or concern to the boy..they just ask the security to take them away...angelina jolie is the only one touched..and she goes and uses almost all her money to help these pple...then travels to the place where they live....(showing how unfortunate pple can be)...

it was kind of a touching story..but only watched it halfway..but it really shows me another point of view of how unfortunate pple can be...it reminds me of our mission trip...i know feeding these pple are important..but watching the movie with the eyes of being a christian...its like i felt i was so spoilt, so pampered...always complaining, dun we sporeans all do that?...COMPLAINING...when we are like in one of the most technology updated country and live under a roof...have food to eat..but we still can complain this one not nice...that one not nice...we've really not seen the world...

maybe u all have gone thru alot of seminars or speeches of how unfortunate other pple in other countries are...even pictures of how skinny they are....but have we ever thought of recognising us as the fortunate one..and having the responsibility of having a need to help the unfortunate? if u never stop to think b4...think how luck can one be...having ur daily bread everything to replenish and restore all the energy u need...living in a family full of love...having a breadwinner to earn all the money...maybe u dun hav to think so far...just think abt the ones that have to work while studying?...just think abt the ones that are really lost in life....dunno where their lives lead to...dunno whats their purpose..living day to day without knowing whats life really abt?...no religion = no sense of security to die = living life just for the sake of living it = not even thinking abt the universe and its creation, just thinking living is all abt money,happiness,sex,etc....

haiz..i dunno whether u thought abt this b4...u can even look around u..think that there are so many freethinkers out there..no religion..no look forward after death...but ever thought whats worst?..those pple in africa that are going to die...cannot see tomorrow but dun even know where they are going after death...haven even live life to know the truth abt their reason to be on earth...

maybe u feel nothing at this point...but i feel totally like a "cushioned" living thing..not willing to give just a little thought and give some "wool or cotton" to those that are bare and not even able to move...

anyways, thats just a thought for those back in spore...remember, cherish everyday of ur life..remember the unfortunate...not meaning u say something like "i'm more fortunate than them..i feel so happy" to yourself...thats being mean...the least u could do is say a prayer for them...give a penny or two to charity raised for them...or even better...do volunteer work...dun even hav to be go abroad...just in spore, there are already so many pple needing love...if the hip hop band "black-eyed peas" can follow the crowd,use "attitude-filled" words..k i dun judge...but then of course a christian should be able to see more than "where is the love?"...the love is in us..its just whether u are willing to share ur love with the world that lacks it...

remember, everytime u feel so "locked-up", "parents treating u unfair","biasness","no meaning to life"...think abt those tat live day to day finding food for survival..remember those that dun even know God to know their true purpose in life...we true christians do...and thank God for that...;)

i feel like i'm preaching or something..but its just a thought i hope i could share with those that have patience in reading tis..pen off..

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